After a long drive from Sussex, I was looking forward to experiencing the charms of this reputable establishment. 15 minutes after the check-in, I was back on the road, heading towards Llanerch Vineyard, with no refund for a deluxe room, which had turned out to be a fancy janitor's closet located right next to the stairs in a busy corridor, with another door and a tiny window carved into what looked like a boarded-up shop front (both facing the car park), tiled floor, a stained, previously pink armchair in the corner, a hospital-style accessible wet room complete with a shower chair (I had not booked an accessible room) and amplified shuffling of upstairs guests (in addition to the nattering coming from the corridor and the car park) - life imitating a Father Ted episode. I graciously accepted the fact that they were fully booked that evening and therefore unable to offer an alternative room, but I was still rather shocked when the receptionist refused to offer any compensation after admitting she understood where I was coming from. Having worked in the service industry and always treated the staff with utmost respect (scenes, finger-wagging and reciting consumer rights are not part of my playbook), I was expecting reciprocation - some acknowledgement of them having failed to deliver - but all I got was a shrug and a reminder of their terms and conditions.